That’s what some homophobes not only think, but tell other people. We homosexuals are indoctrinating children in school, on the playground, at McDonalds, and probably in the womb somehow.

Bill O’Reilly reported on more than 150 “roving” gangs of lesbians who attack straight people and wave pink guns in their faces. Yes, you read that right, pink guns. Pink Glocks. Now, in all honesty, other than sassyfemme, I don’t know any lesbians that like the color pink and, even if we did, we’ve got better sense than to carry a pink GUN! Heck, we’d want be taken seriously and how seriously can you take anyone who’s just leveled a pink gun at your ass?

And why are these lesbians doing this? Apparently to show that “We’re here, we’re queer, and you can just deal with it.” Or something like that.

These gangs are not confined to the adult ranks, either. Nosiree Bob. According to O’Reilly (whose journalistic credentials are impeccable — [insert eyeroll here]), they’re roving the bathrooms in our grade schools, coming on to straight girls and sexually assaulting them (presumably so they can understand the wonders of lesbian sex and come over to the dark side), and making “gay comments.” Whatever those are.

Since I’m one of them, I’ll let you all in on a little secret now. We have a system. We’re in the city parks. We’re at the proms. We’re at the clubs. We’re in the public bathrooms. We’re at the beaches. We’re even in the churches (disguised as priests). And we want your daughters. Our indoctrination of your daughters is necessary, not because we’re jonesing for a new kitchen appliance, but because we want bigger and better prizes for successful recruitment.

We want the presidency. We want world domination. And we won’t be happy until this entire planet is assimilated and we all live the same kind of life as Wonder Woman came from. And yes, Wonder woman was our first attempt to indoctrinate your daughters. She came from a world (Amazon) where women dominated society (and anyone else that wanted the “lasso of truth” tied around their limbs). We all know that the Amazonians were portrayed as “super-humans” but we want to set the record straight on that, too. We used the term “super-human” because we knew that if we used the term “super-dyke,” your daughters wouldn’t be allowed to view the indoctrination programs. Our ranks today can be directly traced to that program’s success in the 1970s.

But it’s time to indoctrinate a new generation now and we’re tired of the slow and easy approach, so we decided we’d do it by force. “Queer up or get laid up.” That’s our motto now. Hey, someone had to take charge — it’s not like you can count on fags to help take over the world — they’re too busy traveling the Hershey highway, styling hair and re-decorating their living rooms to be interested in things like that. Straight women are the too interested in hiring the fags for hair styles and homestyles, and straight men…well, all they think about is fucking.

So, it’s up to us dykes.

I’d love to finish this post, but I have to grab my pink Glock and meet some other dykes at Chuck-E-Cheese’s in a half hour. There are going to be three birthday parties there and they’re all unindoctrinated girls. Hopefully they’ll all have their Moms with them so we don’t have to go out after dark.